"Persistant Passion"

I have always wondered why my life seemed like a bunch of space junk flying to nowhere. Always wondering why I was put here and what my purpose was. Watching as my children grew up and kissing them goodbye as life took them away.

It isn't fun living in your head that way, but it sure helps you continue to search on for your passion. My last blog was two years ago and I have continued on the journey to finally understanding, it really is the journey and not the destination.

I am who I am because of all the adversity I have been through and my passion stems from the fact that, had I not come up for air gulping with all my might, I would have drowned in my sorrows of life.

I am my passion! Oh I know you may think that is narcissistic, but on the contrary. From the first time I was called fatso in 4th grade I was working with a self esteem deficit. My whole life was affected by that first endorsement because I believed it with all my heart. Why shouldn't I? It was made by a peer whom I thought liked me.

The last two years I have been a work in progress coming to the realization , that bullying affected my entire life. It gave me a false picture of who I was and I bought that picture and lived the within the framework.

My passion is to stop the abuse
and to share my experience with children and parents.

Tolerance is a must in society if we are to evolve, but not tolerance of bullies!!

LOVE AND LIGHT

                                                            "I Am Finally"

 

Most of the last 10 years have been a period of emotional growth for me, and boy has it been a journey! I have gone from a scared, unsure, insecure, and paralyzed child to a strong secure woman. I know the journey is not over by any means. I want to begin writing again and let you begin to know who I am and why. If I can benefit any one life with the sharing of my experiences, it will have been worth all the triumphs and tragedies.

 

These next blogs will explain my life and the roads I have endured. I am not by any means a story teller, but sometimes going through some of life's difficult times knowing someone else experienced the same thing, can help you in your walk.

 

A few things I will be writing about are: My oldest son's addiction to Meth. How I finally lost over100 lbs and kept it off. Dealing with mental illness in a family. Being a product of physical and mental abuse, both in childhood and as an adult. Divorce. Living a large part of my life in a cult church and finally realizing I was brainwashed, and overcoming that issue. These are just a few of my life's trials.

 

Until then

Dee Hall

"The Missing Links of the Attraction Law" 

 

Don't get mad, but I think the "Law of Attraction" has missing links, and I am by no means a guru on the subject. Many people find their happiness starts to dissipate as they participate in this process of attracting their dreams and creating their reality. Why? is my question.

I am most miserable when I realize, all of the techniques, if you want to call them that, have failed and I am not achieving the happiness and peace I so long for, let alone the physical manifestations so many people brag about. What am I doing wrong?? Then I realized over a week in absolute hell emotionally and physically, that there was a missing link, at least for me. Pushing the Universe, coercing reality, and  thinking constantly about something was taking away the actual enjoyment of the things I had already created. So what was the use of creating them in the first place? On to the next miserable moment of creating everything for nothing. Is that what I was doing??? Creating my life and never really enjoying it. That was the moment I realized, unless I learn, and I mean teach myself the tools to enjoy what I am creating, it is all for not.

Another week of pure hell and I believe I have emerged from my cocoon a butterfly ready to soar in the peace and happiness that allows me to enjoy one moment, and then another moment, and then another. " Living in the precious present right now moment" is the thing that allows the creating to come forth and actually happen. If you allow the Universe to bring into the 3-D existence your dreams and reality without a time limit, or specific outcome, the joy comes back and the peace that passes all understanding as Jesus talked about, lives in you. Heaven on earth.

I am happy most moments now and when I let my mind drift to EGO thinking of the future or the past, I concentrate on exactly the moment I am in. No more anxiety, fear or days when you feel as if there is the rain cloud above your head. I do not want to be Eeyore, but Winnie himself. The always happy bear no matter what.

It isn't easy to stop the chatter in your head or to be "in the moment" but it is sure worth the effort, at least for me, to continue to perfect this tool, as it has brought a whole new dimension to co creation in my life.

Till next time....see I am even enjoying writing again!!! 



" Evolving from the Law of atrraction to the Law of Emergence"

I have always struggled wondering why so many people still struggle. They purchase wealth building materials, and yet are still not seeing results of abundance in their own lives months and even years later. The law of attraction is real, just as real as the law of gravity. We do create our own reality, whether good or bad.
I had an "AHA" moment yesterday that I have probably been working on for awhile. My son and sis started it awhile back and listening to a wonderful speaker yesterday helped put it into perspective for me.
I knew in my heart we are already perfect, and yet many are struggling to emerge. I keep hearing from so many gurus, you must attract what you are lacking. Just do all the basics..dream, meditate, concentrate on what you want 12 times a day...FOCUS!!! We do...We do...and We do...and yet nothing..That was a struggle for me. If we are attracting, what is it that stops so many wonderfully creative people from creating?
We came here to journey until we have learned what it is we signed up for. To find our true "soul" self. We all have a destiny and we are creating it each second of the day, with each thought we entertain. Instead of thinking we are lacking something and need to learn the "Law of Attraction" to get that which we lack to come to us, a small shift in perspective allows one to see the forest beyond the trees. We don't lack anything. We are already created perfect. We are everything we could ever imagine. We have everything we could imagine. We are!!! Cause and effect doesn't really exist. Lets look at it another way... We are a spirits in a 3-D body still trying to emerge and find our full potential. The trials we face can become a wonderful tool to work with as we emerge. Stop thinking you lack anything and begin knowing "you are perfect" and using what I call the "hardship hammer" to your benefit. What I mean by this is, when conflict arises we get cracked open a little more.This lets our true selves emerge even more and we can work through and confront those fears, doubts, ect head on and finally release them and the power we have naturally gets stronger and stronger. The bible says "And which of you with taking thought can add to his stature one cubit?" Which means we are already perfect. An oak tree is a small acorn, and unless it is surrounded by all the things it needs to grow will remain so,but with water and sun and soil it will emerge into a huge oak tree, The oak tree is already there. How about seeds in the forest wrapped so tightly that the only thing that allows them to emerge and grow into a beautiful plant or tree, is a forest fire. We consider that devastating and yet it is not intended to be, That fire releases that tree so we could behold it!!!
Many people create from the lower grids still today, not from a pure heart. Oh they "get many things and yet as you know studies have shown lottery winners often end up worse off than before,Why?? If you do not create from your heart, it was never really yours on another level. So many people are rich and miserable.
Stop struggling with the Law of Attraction and willing things into your life. Let go and learn to release the thoughts that bind you and naturally you and all the things you already are will emerge . Like Michelangelo said when he was done with his beloved "David" He was always in the block of stone, I just let him out!!!

"The Source is an Amazing Thing" "You are what you think most of the time" I am a firm believer in this quote.I was reminded this morning by a lovely women, that taking responsability for YOU is the start of any healing process. Until you come to a point in your life where validation from others is not needed, you will never progress. Life is a path of twists and turns, but if you truly love who you are at a core level you will move. Emotionally, physically and spiritually. Everyone has gifts to give and when you find yours..give them with all your heart. I have been doing some major soul searching for the past 4 weeks or so, asking what more I can do to help this world reach a state of "heaven" and I realized today, it is helping people everyday become what they came here to be. It isn't about you...Take your spiritual eyes and gaze upon the moment and remember "love" is the only connection we all have and if you aren't living in LOVE you are disconnected from the true Source of your being!! Think hard about this, and yes I am quoting from the Good Book..Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Is this you?? Does this describe your behavior?? Be honest with yourself. If you are not continually meditating on these virtues YOU ARE DISCONNECTED. If you can remember do give a "love act" daily...you can change the world!! STOP...but you must first love yourself. What does your "mind movie" play each day?? Thoughts of forgiveness for yourself or wild self demeaning pictures?? Time to change the software if the latter is true. "You are what you think most of the time" Change your thoughts and change your life. Oh,you say, that is a horrific task. Yes for some it is a long journey..and a hard one. Guess what? You never arrive..never. You must start somewhere and let that day be today. Love who you are, validate yourself with your HEART not your mind and take baby steps and pretty soon bigger steps will follow. ASK for help along the way. There are people that love you, even if you don't love yourself yet. You can find that place of peace, if you BELIEVE it exits, and it does believe me. A wonderful Angel came to me at just the right time in my life..this morning..which is always just the right time. Live moment to moment. Plant a mind seed and it will bloom into a wonderful flower... Love to you all

" A Friends Poem"

WOW, it has been a long time since I've sat down and put feelings to words. I think I will just leave you today with a poem written by my new friend Tracy Janzen. This poem gave me a feeling of release. There is in all of us, something or someone we want buried and gone...A truthful way of putting it Tracy!! I'm killing you softly, a little at a time. I'm watching you lifeless. Your death is mine. I'm covering your mouth. Silenced forever more. Watching you panic. As I enjoy this chore. I'm watching you coldly. My compassion is gone. I'm killing you softly, as I move on. Your words are beneath me. Meant to malign. Silenced forever, your death is mine. I'm disassembling you, a piece at a time. Burying the parts, that are stuck in my mind. I'm killing you softly, a little at a time. Moving on completely, is my only crime. Tracy!!

" I WANT TO HELP"

Many of you know I have gone through a major transformation in my personal life in the last year or two. Part of that process was learning who and what I am, and changing spiritually. For many years, I was trapped in an overweight body, as well as an overweight mind. It was a terrible way to exist on this earth. The anxiety I felt was extremely overwhelming, and needless to say, I knew change had to be made, or I was going to die early.
I want to give my story to people, and let them know, why and how this transformation took place, so I can give back to this world, and help others stuggling today as I did so many years. I thought I was doomed to repeat the process of day to day living, scared of life and literally scared of ME. I have accomplished many goals recently, one of which was shedding over 100 pounds in less than a year, and learning, by research how to do this without gimmicks and drugs. I have nothing against weight loss methods,but for me they all failed miserably,as each one left out a major component...a heart change was needed as well. I ask each of you, if you are stuggling with weight loss to look at my facebook page. There are before and after pics. If you need help..I am in the process of writing my story and how I achieved my goals. I hope you can find some inspiration in what I went through..and know if I can do it, anyone can...Please watch for my story..

Communication

My God, how important communication is in a relationship. If it doesn't exsist, there is no RELATIONship. I see couples everyday just give up because silence has taken over and niether knows how to start the process of REALLY talking again. They walk through their daily routine wondering why they aren't happy and fulfilled and they don't know why. Silence and non-communication is the cancer eating core of the destruction of most marriages and relationships. Just opening a conversation is scary, and what if the other person takes what you say thewrong way?...the endless limbo goes on and on and on.
Effective communication begins with yourself and believing what you have to say is important. If you don't believe it is worth taking the risk, even if you lose the relationship..why be in it in the first place? Relate..an intersting word... take time to read the definition...
We are with someone to enhance our lives, love and respect, and yet so many suddenly find themselves in such a destuctive pattern of no communicaton or mis-communication that the divorce papers or door is staring them in the face and they have no clue why.
Talking and limiting that talk to the subject at hand, checking emotions at the door, is so important. Letting your partner know the way you feel..NOT THE WAY HE OR SHE MAKES YOU FEEL. Take a time each week to respectfully let your partner know how you feel and then let that person alone and let it go. Keep the conversation short and sweet and understand, for some, it takes some time to digest even the best said things. Start slow if the talking has taken a vacation and remember, this could be new to both of you...step lightly and most of all, come at all things with love and the best intentions for the other person. Read some books on communication and learn it's value. It might save your happiness and love for the stranger you live with now!!
Love to all

"INTENT"

Intent.... What a word. Never knew it was the same as "Desire"  You learn something knew every day, if you listen closely
Do you live by your ego or your heart?? Seems to me, ego destroys everything that intent wants to create for your life. Get rid of the ego and the intent, desire can manifest great things in your life. You and the Source can create anything you want, and it is magnificent to watch. Let go and create what intent has waiting for you.
Love what you do and love the people around you. Choose these things and your life flows...live by selfish ego and the road can be really bumpy. You don't have to figure it all out, intent does that for you. Just grab hold and go for the ride.
Many people have no idea that the Source is available to all..you must learn how to re-connect with it. That may be, but it is not the easiest thing to do..RE-CONNECT. Just how is that done??
And how did we get dis-connected??
Spirit is the same as intent, and all things living are connected together by one Source. What is amazing to me is the fact that nature has no problem with intent..and acorn knows exactly what it will be in the end as well as a seed. We, on the other hand have big problems because we think too much and hinder the process of our intent. Heart is what should connect us to the Source and yet the wonderful mind we have been given actually gets in the way of that process. It's a bugger!!
They say..Just let go... WOW if that were as easy as it sounds, everyone would understand..I know sometimes I don't, and I get caught up living in doubt and I have to say DELETE!!!! STOP... let my higher self take over and know INTENT is looking after me.

"Kick it Up a Notch" "BAM"

What gifts do you have to bring to the table of life?? Many don't know or are trying to figure it out day by. I am still trying to figure out what my gifts are. All of us have them, but sometimes they are hidden until the right time. With what mind do you get up with in the morning? A servants mind or a selfish mind?? Do you look around you and keep your eyes open for opportunities to brighten anothers day? Or do you think on what can I achieve for selfish gain this day. Don't get me wrong, having is not wrong, for what we have we can share with all. It is a heart thing that opens up the world to each of us, and gives us a peace that passes understanding. Life and things will flow perfectly  as you get rid of the EGO and live in the heart. That is not easy to do as the ego can be a very strong entity to overcome. It was meant to be strong to carry us through hard times when we need to "kick it up a notch", but not so hard we can't manage it and only use it when warrior times approach. And they do many times in our life.
Look in the mirror and remember, you are a special and you have much to give to this earth. Run with those gifts and remember, the perfect person does not exist, we all have faults, and we all have gifts to share with mankind. Your gifts will always give you a peace in your heart, it may be giving of money, giving encouragement, giving love, giving a smile, giving advice {if asked}. Just strive to make this world a more peaceful and loving place and you walk with Spirit.
You are changing this world for good, if for once you live for others and not for yourself. One random act of kindness stirs the positive energy we so badly need to live peace!!
Love who you are as well, for if you are not positive who you are, then how can you positively influence anything...
Have a day of giving and see how it changes your life
Till next time!!

"Are You Ready??"

Many of you realize we are coming into a time when this earthly life will become easier and we will finally have what we need to accomplish those jobs we seem to understand we were put here to do and have been doing for quite sometime,although with much uncertainty... Many of us have feelings of unrest right now...and that is perfectly normal. Many don't know why they are here and that is ok as well. We are at a pivital time in this planets history..many of you understand that, but for those of you who don't..life can seem extremely confusing. You will know all things when you are ready is what many tell me. I always want to stress though that you must listen to Spirit and quiet yourself to hear. There are many people who believe we are going to just END. My beliefs are yes we will end, but begin. Are you ready to co-create your life?? Many of you understand the implications of what that means. Having enough for once... knowing all will be alright, and being positioned to rest in your soul from all the work you have been doing. Physically, many have been on a very painful journey for a very long time working hard to achieve the goals they have been striving for. One thing to remember is that a positive attitude always prevails and even in times of what seems to be spiritual darkness "what am I doing here?",keeping the old "chin up" attitude will bring peace to your heart where once feelings of "I'm done" lived.
I try to write to the many beautiful people out there who are coming into an understanding, but aren't quite sure of their purpose. It's ok not to have a full understanding of why you feel the way you do, but to know there are many who feel like that at just this point in time. Confusing?? Yes,but knowing you have people that are just like you and are on a journey of some kind, makes it a little more tolerable when the darkness is right in front of your eyes. Don't worry the black will eventually clear and you will be able to see far far beyond... For now rest and listen...You will hear in the distance.Till next time...

"My Storm"

As I gazed out of the window, I wondered how long we were destined to remain in this place on top of a mountain. I wondered if I should pursue friendships or remain silent while we waited to see where life took us. Fortunately friendships came regardless of my wishes and our life here on the mountain became a routine of insanity for me. The days turned into weeks and the weeks into months... many times if it had not been for a very good friend, I might have thought life was not worth living. I absolutely could not understand why we were here and for what purpose we must stay. I started pondering just what my lifes purpose was and that made me more upset with my life here. I struggle knowing I am here for a reason, and yet not knowing the specifics is like standing in the rain waiting for SOMEONE to bring you an umbrella. I must admit, parts of my existence here are hell on earth. I am slowly learning many people are going through the same process in their lives. Uncertainty about residences,relationships,jobs,money, and just plain unrest!! Unrest is the only word I can describe the past months of my life. I feel as if all I know and have ever known makes no difference in how I feel, and yet I feel the storm approaching before the beautiful sun peeks through the clouds of my life, and the warmth of the sun on my skin makes me forget all the months of hurt and unrest. Life is ready to unfold and as I reach out I know I will finally feel the energy this storm has been gathering.

"I Choose to Create a Wonderful Tomorrow"

I have to admit, this has been the absolute hardest time in my life. For those of you that have no idea, I am going through what I thought would be an easy divorce. Little did I know, I was so wrong!! I had every intention of being the guy who takes the high road..but someone keeps dragging me through the dirt!!I still want to be reasonable and kind and forgiveness is not an option..it is a must for me to heal. I may never forget though. They say divorce is like death..yes well mine died many years ago, so I started with depression and ended with "love covers many things" attitude. Thank you soon to be X for bringing me through hell..I came out in heaven and learned much while I survived.
I also have a very special friend who saved me much heartache. I can say this person was my Angel sent from the Source. Thank you to this person for probably saving my life at one point or another with kind words and a kind ear. When the Source provides a person to nurture you through hard times..feel blessed always, for you are special enough to have an Angel.
It is not over yet, but at least I made it through the hardest part, being alone for the first time in many many years. Oh the FEAR!! It is immobilizing. All the thoughts that flow endlessly through your mind.."Will I survive all this?" "Am I going to be able to support my child?" They never end..Until you just give them up!! Stop throwing the thought pebbles of negativity into your attitude pool. Find positive pebbles and cast them in every day like diamonds. They are the thoughts that are creating your tomorrows. Soon your life takes on a new meaning, and fear turns into faith and love is your vehicle that carries you along. Love what you are creating everyday and look at it with the innocence of a child. Marvel that you are creating your life every minute and look at it as GOOD!! Live right now and remember everything else in neutral. You decide if it takes the drivers seat by your allowing a perception to take a root in your mind!! Cultivate your garden with love and no judgement of anyone or anything and watch your fruit be the best ever...even if you plant at the wrong time!I choose to create a wonderful tomorrow!!

"My Angel"

I have a special person in my life who has seen me through some of the most awful times I have ever faced. This person amazes me on a daily basis, never turning from me even though most would have abandoned me for lack of understanding. A counselor would not have done a better job at listening, and when advice was asked for it was always given in love. I saw a card tonight at the store that described our friendship so well, but alas a Christmas card has already been given. This card described how true friends never give up on one another, never leave one another under any circumstances. They may disagree on subjects, but the respect they hold deep inside for each other prevents them from holding a grudge. My special person has listened to me scream,cry,and probably growl at my life and yet always calmed me down with a soothing "are you finished yet?" and a direction to walk. This person waked me through some dark valleys, up some tall mountains, and through some FIRE. Holding my hand, sometimes like a little girl.I know for a fact now I have never had a better more loving friend in the 47 years on this earth. If I could give you the world my friend, I would and you know that. If I could give you back half of what you have given me,life would be better in my eyes. This person has made me laugh, cry and love in a whole different way. I see things through different eyes as my friend has whittled my eyes into eyes that see clearly, maybe for the first time in my life. If I knew I would be blessed in so may ways by this person, I would have prepared. How, I do not know. You really do not know the changes you have helped me make friend, and how much I cherish you. I hope your life gives you all you deserve..for you are my ANGEL sent from above!!

"I AM"

I am: I am a helper when the need arises. I am a loving human being. I am fearful of the unknown.I am a best friend. I am a go getter, when there is something to go get!! I am a lover. I am a mother. I am a sister I am a daughter. I am a cryer. I am sensitive. I am bold. I am happy. I am sad. I am a woman. I am a little girl(sometimes). I am a giver. I am a teaser. I am a laugher. I am a deep thinker. I am a secret keeper. I am an opinion giver (if asked). I am an open book. I am a nutritionist. I am a homeopathic guru. I am a fun person. I am a runner. I am an avid personal eating coach. I am a movie watcher. I am a mountain hiker. I am an exerciser. I am always looking at others to make sure they are fine. I am a care giver. I am a child lover. I am a nanny. I am crazy. I am a lover of practical jokes.I am a lover of people. I am spiritual. I am romantic. I am beautiful in my heart.I am a lover of good food and fine dining. I am a lover of the ocean. I am a lover of helpers like me. I am pissed at any abuse. I am healthy. I am happy just talking. I am a lover of the time with my best friend. I am a California girl. I am a tornado chaser. I am a storm lover. I am a person you might find you like. I am a person you might find you don't like. I AM.... Dee Anne Hall

"ME" is My Only Comfort

Sometimes I get so confused about life. There is always this little voice inside me saying "Are you doing what you are supposed to do?" Does anyone else think about that on almost a daily basis?? I wonder if I am ever going to be content in knowing I am doing the "right thing" for me, and of course the world. I know I was put here for the purpose of serving...because it gives me such joy to help another achieve. I feel worth something. Just living for myself is one of the most unfulfilling journeys, and if that is what life is about, I do not want any part of it. And yet it can be torcher wondering always daily if you have done your duty. I have learned to ease up on myself and just enjoy what comes along. I try to keep my eyes open as to the path the Divine has put me on.
Learning to live in the here and now is the hardest thing to learn. Daily I try to practice that lesson and yet I find myself and my thoughts wandering to the future or the past. The past for me is sad and the future can be wonderful or scary depending on my mood. Joy really does come from centering and living in the present precious moment. The word WORRY does not exist when you live for "RIGHT NOW". I can rest in that thought if only I could live it well.
Joy and peace come in waves, and we as humans struggle to feel that each moment. I have to tell myself, it is okay to feel sad sometimes, mad sometimes and downright angry about things sometimes. I am the only one who can change my thought status... I am the one who decides who or what can touch me..emotionally or physically. I am me, and each day I am becoming more comfortable with "me" because in this moment, "me" is my only comfort!!

"Change is Good"

Do you ever look in the mirror and think 'who am I and where did I go? I have gone through some life changing trials in the past few months, and there were many times I thought I was never going to find Dee Anne again. That is scary because, truly you begin to wonder who you ever were!! One day clouds into the next, and you realize you have now become a totally different person and the old one is gone forever. How did you live as that old person?? and are you ever going to feel comfortable in your new skin?? I am here to tell you yes and the skin can be silk if you let it. Depression is real and can play a part in the whole metamorphosis. The sun doesn't shine many days as you under go spiritual surgery. Sometimes you wonder if you will ever feel right again...You will..time has such a way of healing things but the waiting is HELL!!
Grab hold of your blanket and your thumb and take a break. Expect nothing while you go through the changes of divorce, relationships, job changes, and any upheaval. You must give your mind and body time to adjust to their new surroundings!! It is unpleasant and can feel like you are dying, but go with it!! Soon the clouds will lift and you will emerge a butterfly successfully molded from a caterpillar so many months ago. You will be able to start appreciating your beautiful colors and looking in the mirror without cringing anymore!! You will fly again and wonder how you ever survived the PAIN of the cocoon you lived in for a little time.
I was very blessed to have a very wonderful friend walk down the road of what seemed like insanity at times, with me. That friend will never know how many time they saved me from myself and my thoughts of leaving this world. Do angels come to people..yes I believe so..This person knows quite well how bad I felt sometimes and stuck with me through it all. It may not be over either..but the storm clouds have given way to some blue sky at least for me and I think I am back in the land of the living again...So when you are re-doing...and it seems life is punching you in the face..turn the other cheek and feel it, smell it, taste it..use all your being to absorb what you are going through...then let it go and the day will come when you look in the mirror and say...Change is good!!! I like ME again!!

"My Passion"

Have you all figured out yet by my posts that I have 2 passions. Helping people and teaching holistic nutrition as a way of life. I hate Big Pharma and their greedy little fingers in everyones lives. Western medicine is a joke and no offense to the good doctors out there, but they don't have a clue in my opinion. It isn't their fault,they are taught that way all through medical school. Don't fix the problem, fix the symptom!! With drugs I might add. Drugs that kill off your major organs in time and actually make YOU sick!! Oh please, don't even try to defend them..even the ignorant people can see the lawsuits happening already, and let me tell you, this is just the beginning. If I can help educate one person, I am in heaven on earth. If I can help one person I am grateful. I know the truth about health, and the sad fact is Americans are buying into the prescription drug merry-go-round. "Take another Sir to help get rid of the first drugs side effects" and on and on it goes,where it stops..I KNOW...Liver failure??, Kidney failure, Heart Failure?? Not enough?? How about death..is that big enough for you to stop ingesting pills for every blinkin" symptom you might have, or just because your doc says to!!! It is time for each person to take responsibility for their own health.
Your body is a miracle machine and can heal itself given proper nutrition and holistic approaches to the sickness. Check out the meds your doc supplies..research and do not take them blindly,I beg of you!!! You only have one liver...It is supposed to MAKE cholesterol...But of course you must be on a statin drug to trick your own liver into not making what God designed it for...because a doc has said to you..your liver has gone wild and is out of control!! We must stop it from making a substance needed for every human bodies function right down to breathing!! Amazing.I do believe if a doctor said that Goodyear tires would cure cancer we would be making tire goulash...Wake up and smell the deception people and get a grip..you are your own Physician..heal thyself!!! This is "My Passion"

"The Crying Game"

I was always raised to believe if you cried you were a sissy..even girls. Could be because my dad wanted boys and got 2 girls instead or it could be because there was not one show of emotion in our house as we grew up. I never understood why we didn't hug or kiss until much later in life when I realized you can't pass on what you never learned unless you make a huge persistent effort to change a long time pattern. I decided I was going to do that, and I did it pretty successfully, although it was hard and took a great deal of time. In my house we kiss and hug and CRY if need be. I still had a hold over about crying though, I felt as if I should learn to control my tears...I also felt very weak minded when I did cry!! Tears are meant to give a release to one, and to cleanse ones mind and soul...I have alot of dirt to get rid of and when instances come up that produce tears, I now know, it is just my cleansing time and to "just do it" as the saying goes. Some of my tears may come from looking at a majestic mountain, some from a little child with a birth defect, or some may come when someone says "NO Tears". Anything can make me cry, and I have come to realize, that is just ME and there is nothing wrong with us being just who we are...I am not weak..I am sensitive...I am not a sissy....I have a big heart. It all depends on how you look at things. The first time someone said to me in a stern way.."It is okay to cry" I pondered that for months..struggling to cry without guilt.I must admit I still fight it...when the stinging comes...I try hard to push back the feelings, but it is getting better and I try to analyze why I am crying. I realize sometimes there is NO reason..and it is OKAY!!!
Are you feeling guilty over something from your past?? Sit down and really understand what and why you feel that way, then embrace it, and then let it go. I know easier said then done!!I thought I had done it several times over...put it away!!! Just keep working on it!!! and when and if you feel like crying..let the tears come. let them flow, and give into that wonderful cleansing. Let it out and let it go!!! It produces freedom in your whole body... I play "The Crying Game" often...

Do You Really Love Me??

Many years of my life have been spent abused by others. I am not ashamed to admit this, as it has been a large part of the 'wondering game' that dances in my head. Sometimes I play the game as it begs me to play. It is not a fun game,but never the less, it beckons me to play many minutes out of my day. My thoughts tease me into believing I am not a worthy player in this game of life, and threaten to push till I fall from the cliff for good!!
I always thought because I was emotionally abandoned so young as a child, that no one really loved me and as the emotional, as well as physical abuse continued through my adult life, I was destined to play the 'wondering game' forever.I felt if someone could tell me just one more time they loved me, I would believe them. If they could say it 200 times it would sink in, but on the 201st time I would be a doubter again.
It was a miserable existence for me, never really trusting anyone. I have to admit the trust issues remain.
Then one day I had an "Aha" moment with the help of a dear friend. Love is different for each person and we all express it differently. The abuse I lived through could make me stronger or continue to make me feel unworthy. My dear friend convinced me finally that other people struggle as well and with much more than I. I guess it is like the person who says..."wish I had a new pair of shoes" until he sees the person without feet. That "aha" moment really changed me. I no longer feel that love escapes me and I am not worthy of love. I might understand it a bit different than some, but I can now be thankful for the moments I have and stop the wondering game, for I know now I am loved by one if not many, but for sure by one person who took the time to convince me I am worthy. I am thankful for you.
If you feel lost and unloved, remember, you do not have to live in the past. It is a choice to open up your heart and let love come in or remain closed to everyone in your life. I am choosing to look in the mirror and love me again and to believe because I do, someone can and does really love me. I don't have to ask anymore.."Do You Really Love Me?"

The Blessing of a Best Friend

You know, someone said to me one day,"I don't think I have ever had a best friend in my whole life" and it hit me like a ton of bricks, only because, I realized at that moment, I really had not either.
It made me evaluate what a real best friend would look like. As I pondered this thought, I realized again that friendship in this world is taken very lightly, and that when the road gets tough the tough get going.I started thinking of my best friend on this earth right now and how our friendship was faring. This is actually the person that had said the previous quote to me.
Here is what I came up with that has glued us together through some thick and thin times.
Each of us respect each others personality flaws, no one is perfect.
We love each other and can literally tell each other anything.
We really want the best for the other even if it hurts us in watching it be achieved.
We want the others happiness more than our own.
We can listen to each others opinions and yet have enough respect for one another to decline the option or not.
Being with each other is not always perfect, and yet when all is talked out we are back to what we are..best friends.
We are good when we are together and the laughter brings us through times where silence could kill us...
We both feel blessed beyond measure we have one another and promise we will always be there and not go when it gets tough.
We tell each other the hard things we do not want to hear about ourselves and sometimes get mad, but know it is for our own good...
I love you best friend and always will..you have taken me down some hard roads and held my hand through it all...
You are an amazing person and I KNOW you will always be there no matter what, and I will be there for you.
Because you are "The Blessing of a Best Friend"

My Walk.........

There once was a girl who struggled to understand what her purpose for existence was. She searched her heart and her mind to no avail. She read books to inspire her and asked people to give her their opinion...She new there was more to life than what she was doing and that her purpose was just beyond her nose. She just could not get a hold of it. She consulted her heart many times as she new it was hiding there, not willing to show its face. She prodded and prodded and nothing. Sorry that she faced many days on this earth not understanding her PFE, she became obsessed with finding that purpose. That happens sometimes as you realize you have one.
She started asking herself and her heart and is continuing to expect the answer soon.
We all have a PFE, and when, and if we truly want to know it will find us.I am searching for mine, as I am the girl in the story. I may be in the middle of mine, and don't know it or am living it as we speak. I do know that I am here for a purpose and it will find me as I keep my heart and eyes open.
Are you fulfilled and happy..or are you lost and bitter? Ask the question and answer it honestly. I am on the road and seems long and far..but I am willing to walk it to find the answers I need. Will you come along for the walk??.It may take us far into ourselves!!

"The Future"

Did you know yesterday
what you think you know today??

You know today, you knew nothing about yesterday.
And yet we continue to think about tomorrow

even though, we know nothing about tomorrow.
Why do we think we know anything today??

"Works for Me"

I found an old friend the other day and started thinking about the treasures we have in memories. No matter how old we are, we can always sit back in our rocking chairs..(speak for yourselves) and close our eyes and remember the good old times. It is oh so much better than a camera and usually is not accidentally deleted.
We may have had young childhood friends we played with until nighttime everyday. Hide and seek till we were so worn out, a cup of Koolaid (I am dating myself)called our names loudly. Running together till we couldn't run anymore. Finding the best tree to climb,the best jump rope to jump, and the best pool to swim in.
Then we became a little older and found our first kiss and crush. Always wondering what that very special one really thought of us...Did he or she really like us..or were they going to break our heart the very next day. Oh the drama of it all.
Then all of a sudden we are adults. Where did that come from?? I wanted to stay young and happy and never have to grow up.I just wanted to stare at the moon and think about the next day...cause that was all there was..the next day!!!
Then life hits you right square between the eyes and you realize, there is no turning back. Off you go fully engaged in your life,thinking STOP! it is going too fast!!
Now, as I sit staring up at the moon, I wonder instead of thinking about tomorrow as I did in my childhood,I think about yesterday and am thankful I have my memories to think back on and my childhood to remember, because sometimes our adulthoods are full of learning and mistakes and we wonder why we just couldn't stay young..Works for me!!

FEAR...GO AWAY!!!!

Fear seems to rule alot of people.I am the first to admit, it does me. It could be fear of the unknown, fear of God, fear of hell, fear of not being good enough. You can attach fear to anything and that particular thing becomes a nightmare in your life.
The opposite of fear is love. Fear cannot exits if love overcomes it. In any enlightened source, love is the thing that overcomes any fear. How do we bring love in and cast out fear? By letting go of all issues that control a particular issue in your life. Oh I know you are thinking, "Yeah right..just let go" We are human and need a physical act to solidify a feeling in our life. We live in the 3rd dimension, therefore it is an easy thing to believe, we just drank a glass of tea, if we have an empty glass staring at us. Instead of just letting a fear go, give it to something. Give it to your stuffed animal, your creator, a journal..just give it to something.Daily, walk from that fear but say the letting go out loud..or write it in the journal. Our subconscious will do what we tell it. It will help us create things in our life..but it has to believe it. That is why many people journal or affirm things out loud. Giving it away leads to a belief that it is really gone, or here. Christians pray to God as a means of affirming their beliefs. Meditation is another life altering exercise. Give your fears away in a concrete way and they will leave.
Blessings
Dee

Orthorexia Nervosa..What???? My view on healthy eating being a mental disorder.

Can you believe it?? People who are concerned about what goes into their mouth having a "Mental Illness" or disorder. Orthorexia Nervosa is the new serious psychological disorder of the day. No kidding, if you focus on eating healthy foods, you are "mentally diseased". According to The Guardian, we who care that eating the SAD can make you sick and choose to eat a more healthy diet are ill. Well I guess that means I can apply for a dis-ability then, and get the government to pay me to be healthy...AWESOME!!! That makes my day..Come on you all..You can have a dis-ability for most mental illnesses...Let's do this.
This just trips my trigger...I have the mental capacity to say no to sugar,GMO foods,high fructose corn syrup, and any other detrimental food and I am considered a mental case..AMAZING!!!
I am getting tired of "BIG PHARMA", and you can bet they've got some drugs to help me with my "disorder", telling me "who I am" and why.
The people who eat "normal" processed junk foods laced with toxic chemicals are now the "right thinking" individuals. I think not. Why do you think dead, processed foods remain the default meals in public schools, hospitals and prisons? Get healthy and start thinking clearly..Oh no that would make us independent thinkers...
Does this make anyone else mad??
If you want to eat junk and think junk, that is your right..but leave us people, who have chosen a more perfect way ALONE!!! Better yet,try an "organic apple" a day..it does keep the doctor away!!!

"Demons in the Closet"

Today was a sad day for me. I was walking my dog as I do each morning, and ran upon a woman verbally abusing her small son. My first instinct was to run up to her and pop her one and grab her son and take him away. What is it with people?? I started to cry..Her son was so scared, you could see it in his little eyes, he would have done anything to escape the pain of what I am sure she has done to him many times before.
God blesses people with gifts and adults abuse them. It ruined my day to say the least and I wonder what Karma she will reap being as evil as she is.
Is she my enemy??I prayed for her, and the small child. What in her past life could make her so cruel?
Children are so special to God, He says if you hurt a child it would be better to have a millstone(HUGE ROCK) tied to your neck and thrown into the sea...I think that is pretty clear...You will not be having a good time in what you reap.
Animals and children are big pet peeves when it comes to abuse..all abuse is WRONG..it just seems it is more wrong when the abused can't fight back. Children and animals are so helpless. I beg you today to evaluate any wrong doing in your life when it comes to physical and mental abuse. Many times we hide our wrongs because we can't help what we do. I beg you..are you doing wrong? and if you are..please get help..If I can get one person by writing this to seek help, it was worth it all...
We can always be forgiven, but not until we admit our demons in the closet.

"Have you lost you?"

It is so hard to walk the line between self respect and light kindness. You can give so much,, thinking you are selfless and find out you have totally lost "yourself". All of a sudden you are asking yourself, "Who am I?".
We have a right to be connected to what is inside ourselves, and to not let another take the core of you in any way. Many people are abused and yet they have gone through it so much, it seems totally natural to give way beyond what is healthy.It may even take another person to say something before they understand, it could be abuse!!
Many people I know, have lost their self in another person, and don't even realize it. Have you?? A healthy relationship,not lopsided, is very rare indeed. Most couples have a giver and a taker..Which are you?? Unfortunately the giver does not realize how much of him or herself they have given over the years and all at once there is a feeling of being used when they wake up.
If we can analyze the situation and remedy it before we feel used and realize we have let the other person abuse us, we may be able to overcome the issue and become healthy again.
Each person has to give in a relationship, I just ask you to make sure yours is healthy and that you have your core in tact. You do not want to wake up one day and say "Who am I and what am I doing here?" It is a long road back!!

Life is About Learning

Are you here on this earth to learn something each day? If we all took that kind of attitude, the world would become a place of peace, and kindness would rule. Rude and unkind people have no place in my life anymore. I have decided, I have NO time for them or for their attitudes of darkness. I think many today have forgotten their manners and or never learned any. Each of us has the same 24 hours to evaluate our actions and bed-side manner each day we live. If you don't care what impact you have on each moment you live fine, but please don't get in the way of others who actually work on themselves "spiritually" everyday!!There are some of us who actually try to give the world a part of themselves and to add an ounce of kindness to someones day.
I challenge you to ask yourself,and be honest, if you care about only you?? That is a hard one, as we all think we are the cream of the crop in our own eyes. What do you do as a random act of kindness..even if you don't want to. What do you bring to this world as a light? If it takes too long for you to come up with something..maybe you need some soul work. That is a painfull thing to deal with and yet the outcome...is more freedom than you can know!!The truth will set some free.
Look inward and evaluate. I try each day and yet am learning each day how much I do not know!!!

"In the Name of Love??"

I am so totally miffed by an occurrence tonight. Not angry, just miffed, unsettled.
It makes me wonder just what is going on inside a persons head when on the surface, they seem so caring in their earth service and yet just under the surface, they are so caught up in the cause and their belief, they turn into raging judgmental maniacs. If you do not agree with their belief system..then hate reeks from their pours and hits everyone around!! all in the name of "love" to them...They hisssss angry words to condemn the non-conformers and yet in their own eyes are admirable..I have even seen them say a human should be killed because of a mistake that rubbed their belief the wrong way..Kill another?? of your own?? in the name of good?? What the heck is that??? I am always trying to stay positive and yet so many things (terrible things) have been done "in the name of love" and justified in the eyes of the believer. I am sure that is not what our Creator had in mind, when we are to love one another. I guess I am venting my thoughts, but People...We still have to respect all peoples views and treat each with dignity and kindness, even if they are different than our deep down convictions.If we don't we make love a placebo..it works sometimes and other time not.Wouldn't want that on my conscience..How about you??

"What Can You Do Without??"

It is moving day for us in 5 days. Ouch, can I get it all done? I have moved so many times it's not funny. Being in the military and buying and upgrading houses have put me in that situation.I have realized though as I go through my life, that I am automatically getting rid of "things" I have no use for. I guess I really didn't realize it until just recently during this move. I don't have a need to cling to "things" anymore. One by one they end up at a charity and in someone elses hands.
I am not quite sure why, but I have a feeling it has to do with growing spiritually.
Now don't get me wrong, I enjoy the best life has to offer and the blessings God provides, it's just, I don't have a need for all that luggage. Just because you don't have "stuff" doesn't make you poor, just the opposite for me..FREEDOM!!
We live in a throw away world. They make all things we buy that way now, so I guess I figure, if I buy it used, that is one less thing that will litter our earth in the big "throw away junk pile". I learned long ago from my dad, used is "better" than new on so many levels. I want to commit to using something till it is unusable, then it can be tossed, but I think it unkind to humanity to change your perfectly good new granite counter top just because you don't like the color!! That, to me, is nuts.
I am just a stickler for buying good used things and taking care of them and even giving them to someone else to use after me, a recycling in my mind.
The next time you go out to shop for a big ticket item, maybe entertain the idea of used and our dumps will decrease in size. Your effort in this can make a huge difference.
I mean what really do we "need"??
Dee Hall

"Don't Be Afraid"

Spring has Sprung and I am filled with new desire to GROW this year searching for the more perfect way!!!I have discovered most of my life has been filled with fear...fear of everything..but mostly fear that I may end up in a not so nice spiritual place..I know many of you struggle with that deep down inside,as we have been taught about "hell" since our first touch with Christianity..I have to admit, that at a few points in my spiritual walk..it was on my mind so much it destroyed the joy I know I am supposed to have.
Fear and respect are 2 very different things, and I think we get caught up in this dimension (physical) that we forget perfect love casts out fear...God is not in the business of lurking around walls to catch us at every failure...He is in the business of helping us up when we fall and clapping( so to speak) when we succeed..and smiling on us even when we mess up.If I had a physical dad that was as mean as some Christians make our God out to be..I would walk in FEAR and continually doubt myself..and therefor be no good to anyone at all.
Jesus is trying to enlighten people of His day to understand that to grow Spiritually we must look to Him as our example and think of God as a Father figure....Even though we know God is not a figure of any sort...but to the Jews..that "Father figure" was a big jump!!! They didn't even say His name...Jesus said now you can call Him FATHER..WOW.
When fear grabs you about the unknown..think of your children and the grace you would give them if they messed up and you are not far from from where God is..I know this.

The Source of Love

I sense a smell of spring in the air..What will this new year bring, I wonder? Spring is my favorite time of year..Flowers a blaze with colour,fresh air to breathe and wondrous things to cast our eyes upon. Can this year be better than last?
Most people make resolutions on January 1, but I get my renewed spirit as the grass starts to turn green and the trees bud.
You know this year can be better for you and me..our own thoughts can make sure that happens. Gratitude is something I will practice much more this year and each year to come. When you cast your bread upon the water it comes back always in a mightier way.
I plan to give more and let God bless me more..accepting His blessings instead of quenching them with the thoughts of "I don't deserve them" roaming through my mind...
We must train our minds to think the right way if we have abused them by resounding the same old tune over and over again of negativity.
I plan to place my thoughts on a higher ground this year and when the rain comes, to hold out my hands and feel the purification of the present time and use it for good...
I choose to look at things any way I choose and I choose to lose the bonds of fear and claim what God has for me..Love, relationships, blessings, and most of all remembering to have gratitude to the Source of love..GOD!!!

Your "Soul Mind" Will Surprise You

I have often thought I used to be a very negative thinker.I used to catch myself thinking the most negative things...I am fat, I am ugly, no one likes me..I will never be happy..well, you get the idea. NONE of those things should ever pass through our mind..The tape recorder MUST STOP.I am so bent on stopping all thoughts that do not pertain to life and light, that is has become a daily work for me.
People like me have been told things and we started to believe them, but we don't have to!! When I realized this, my life changed...
Our brains are very complicated matter and when we decide to fill our "soul minds" with any thoughts, they manifest in this world...This is Biblical as well, for all those out there who may think this is a little weird..Ask, seek and knock are verbs YOU do!! We have everything we need..we just can't see it yet and nor will we until we accept it into our lives on a deeper level.
Do you think negatively?? What is manifesting in your life?? Stop and research this practice among the living..Jesus taught it, as well as the some of the most profound people in history!!You are literally what you think..What is faith? Believing in something you can't see yet..YET folks..Keep thinking on it..praying about it..It will come!!And what if it doesn't?? Well can't answer that one..the question is so negative..I think that it is the answer why it doesn't happen.
It takes practice..just Like all the other things you become good at.
Think on whatsoever things are pure, lovely ect...I never see anything negative in this scripture!!Do you??
Get your mind together and change your life..Your "soul mind" will surprise you!!

"You Have No Idea"

My oldest son went off to Colorado yesterday, and I started thinking, "Do they ever really dis-connect from you?" Mine will be twenty-two soon, and I never feel as if he is "all" grown up. They call you now, just like they did, to come and fix their boo boos when they were two. They ask you to tell them "everything will be fine" just like when they they fell off the swing when they were five. They beg for your advice just like they did when they got caught cheating on a spelling test when they were nine. They scream at you now just like when they were frustrated because they had a crush on a girl, who didn't know they were alive when they were thirteen. They don't call you now, just like they didn't talk to you for days, when you grounded them for taking the car without permission when they were sixteen. They cry on your shoulder now, just like they did when they were born.
That is why, when the time comes to help them up as a grown adult you can expect they will forget to tell you they love you, just like the time you dusted off their knees and off they skipped to play once again in the game of life.
They love us as parents, but God made a world to explore, and they must..all by themselves and yet, it is comforting to us when they call and say hey mom.."Did I ever tell you I love you?" and I say.."Oh yes in so many ways..you have no idea!!"

"Broken No More"

BROKEN NO MORE
If you knew who I was, and where I had been
You might think twice before you begin

To try to relate to my broken past
It ain't very pretty, relentlessly cast

I was torn and belittled, shamelessly bit
Sometimes tears would come as I was cornered and hit

Don't feel sorry for me, many like me are here
They live in the silence and darkness and fear

Look into our eyes there's a vacancy there
Sometimes we can't help but to sit there and stare

We are lawyers and mothers and teachers and some
Are nothing because faith was stolen from them

By men who killed us one piece at a time
And threw us away stopping our lives in time.

We are strong, don't you know
We have come a long way

To tell the world NO MORE
This stops today!!

We are loving, deserving and won't let this be
"PERFECTLY GOOD USED WOMAN" a good title for me!!

Purifying Hurts!!

Am I just crazy or are there many people who just think "they are right" period, case closed? Sounds like the "teachers of the law" in the Bible Jesus was so angry with, and yet I run into so many yet, that still don't understand what concept Jesus was teaching...The word tolerance stirs up some pretty nasty Christian snarls!! I know..I have seen them. Tolerance seems to make some Christians feel like they aren't holding up the TRUTH of God...
Lets examine...tolerance. Jesus had tolerance for all who sat at the cross and watched him die..They had a whole different idea of what was going on..and yet Jesus knew exactly what was happening..."Father forgive them for they know not what they do" The woman caught in adultery...NO STONING..the law was still behind Jesus..but think about what He did. Tolerance for Peter...and his mistake of denial..I know some people who would never have forgiven him..why?? No tolerance. Jesus gave tolerance to people when He had every right to dis-own them..Do we give that to others?? Or only when it is easy and doesn't ruffle any of our righteous feathers.
Christians follow Jesus...Who are you following, when you don't look or act anything like our Lord...Look in the mirror and evaluate..it will burn...purifying hurts!!

The Pain That Was

If you saw me today you would wonder was I a kook? or had depression set in...Half the day I was crying and half the day I was "laughing and crying" and all the while thanking God!!!Our family has been going through a test,trial for almost 5 years and it finally ended today.It is far to complicated to explain, but what I want you to understand..God can pull you through ANYTHING!!! 5 years is a long walk in the desert, but He was always there and in the process I saw the miracle come forth from the long wait...My heart saw a Miracle today and I will never forget the grace of our God and how HE CARRIED ME THROUGH IT ALL.
When you are panting for a cold drink of spiritual water..go to the fountain of deep quenching water..the water that no other gives...When you can't take another step...Grab hold of the Almighty's hand..He will lift you up..When you are running from darkness..let His light shine in you and the darkness will disappear!!
We have to go through trials to fall...so we can get back up stronger...like exercise..You tear down a muscle and it comes back even stronger...When you feel like giving up..check it out...God cares and will not leave you, if you depend on Him.
5 years...has it been that long???I feel the passing of the pain already. Like the passing of the clouds we steadily watch as they drift away..God will take our pain away like the clouds and replace them with a blue sky that is second to nothing and you will forget and I will forget the pain that was...

"That Which You Think"

Do you ever get stuck in a rut?? Find yourself doing and thinking the same things day in and day out? We can actually stop progressing..spiritually,emotionally,and physically. We are what we think..if we are all about negative,what else could our lives manifest? I catch myself getting really down on myself..about everything and wondering just exactly why I do that. I already know..It is a natural human tendency to feel negative. It comes from our flesh and not our Spirits. Once a habit is formed, it takes conscious thought on the positive everyday to stop that thought.
I ask myself.."self, just how do we change our thought patterns?" I for one admit, I don't have the answer..but God does and He can help you overcome the times your self wants to destroy you!! Stay prayerful and in all things keep your mind on how the grace of God covers you when it gets tough...
Many of us have had terrible lives..but as I remember someone saying.."He gives the toughest souls the most trials" How are you going to make it through the next trial??
How are you going to stay positive? Look to the Lord and remember, This world is a place you can make a difference. God gave you the tools to do so..grace, mercy and forgiveness are all the tools you need to walk out and touch this world with your mind firmly knowing that no matter what you have ever done, God can help you "THINK RIGHT" and bind the negative and explode the positive. Change the way you "THINK" and your life will present so many more possibilities and people to touch..So live as though it were a POSITIVE DAY and it will become that which you think.

What is Your Gift??

"The purpose of life is to discover your gift. The meaning of life is to give your gift away." I posted this last week on my Facebook page and it got me thinking, does everyone have a gift?? The Bible says we do and if so, is everyone born with it, or do they have to find out what it is? I for one, am on a journey to understand mine and how to give it away. The funny thing is I really never knew I had one let alone how or who to give it to and even if anyone would want it. Until I met a very nice person who encouraged me to understand my gift and as I did..it was much easier to give it away...I am an encourager. I love and almost get giddy when I help people take responsibility for changes in their life, especially when they actually do something about it. I also love to make people laugh...But I knew that from childhood.
I work on Facebook and many people ask me for advice..I am just thankful I have the ability to try and help..and God has allowed me to be a part of their lives.
I am blessed beyond measure in my life and pray I can fill someone elses cup.
People come into our lives to help us evaluate ourselves and then they leave as fast as they came...sometimes we don't understand why..but God does.
Do you know what your gift is??? If not, I encourage you to FIND OUT!!! It may give you a simple yet awesome peace you never really had before. We are all born with a different set of heart prints..find yours and plaster them everywhere...The world will be a better place for it!!!

" I Woke Up This Morning and Cried"

I bet most of you are thinking that the title of my blog today is just a title. No I did wake up this morning and began to cry. I cried for quite awhile and I can't even tell you how much better it made me feel. Sometimes our hearts have to cry..God gave us that emotion as a release. It is not terrible to cry, in fact, it is very good sometimes!!!
After the fact I sat down and pondered why I did cry..Most people think I am happy all the time..must be my starlit personality..LOL right!! I think it had to do with a very unfair thing that has recently happened to my family. God does not like un-balanced scales. He is a fair and just God!! When there is evil going on He says, "Vengeance is Mine" My family has been treated unjustly and I guess I wanted to make it right and inside I was angry. I realized that God said He would take care of it and yet this time it affected a lot of Gods people..because they did not realize they had done this. As unfortunate as it is..We must go to these people with gentleness, and meekness and explain this to them. It won't be easy and yet God said we must. When someone is doing something God is not pleased with..It is our duty as Christians to help them see the error of their ways and get right with God. Now I am not talking about judging..NO that is up to God...but we must learn to do some of the hard things for the Kingdoms sake.
I guess I am writing this to help me remember that although it is much easier to just let sin pass by and hide it under the "DON'T JUDGE LEST YE BE JUDGED" scripture..Sometimes we really need to say the thing that hurts the most..in love correcting one another because we love the brothers and sisters we have in the church!!
Jesus tore the money changers up in the Temple..Why? Unjust scales and cheating...I know from that scripture alone I can confront someone with prayer and love!!!
That is why "I Woke up This Morning and Cried"

"WhoooooooHooooo"

I am totally ready to live in the light of God!! These last few months have been a fiery purification for me and my family. Thank you Lord for allowing the testing of our faith!! Do we want to be tested? Of course not..but God said it will produce patience. Yep, I have a little more of that. Maybe alot...
It is my anniversary today and I am blessed with the most wonderful man in the world. God made him for me. He is a Godly preacher of the gospel of Jesus Christ and a wonderful father and husband..
As I was writing his card out, I started to think "I wonder if he feels the same way"
Have I really been the Godly wife I am capable of? Do I look in the scriptures to test myself against what God says a wife should be...By the way, do not test yourself with Proverbs 31, you will end up crawling under your pillow and never trying again!! Each season of your life is mentioned there. We do have scriptures that can help us see what a Godly wife looks like. I for one..need to repent and try harder. To my dismay and plain rebellion, I must ask my husband to forgive me as I don't match up..BUT..Thank God for Jesus and His grace imparted to me in these times of failure!!! I don't have to go away with my tail between my legs feeling like a failure..Jesus forgave me of my sin 2000 years ago!!Praise God!! Do you take on Satan when he trys to guilt you into thinking you are scum?? Cause you aren't..but he loves to get you feeling so bad you give up...he is the father of all lies!!In God we have the power to make him flee from us..get away..leave us alone..run away...
I am thankful for the power through Jesus to do this as I live for Christ..And I say "WHOOOOHOOOO" to the joy in my heart that is there from this knowledge!! Amen

"I Remember"

I am amazed at how fast this year has gone!! I remember thinking..We can't go to Arizona,we'll die of the heat. God took us there anyway, and I am still here and nothing has melted yet.I remember thinking, I will never see my family again, low and behold my sis has been to see me twice and my mom once..boy was I wrong...I remember leaving Montana and knowing God had a better plan for us. I was right!! I have learned so much in this "desert" of Arizona..I guess God does some of his best work on His people in the "desert". The people in our church here have taught me many things..they have no idea. I have learned how to be quiet, how to watch people disagree(from a distance) I might say, and to keep my opinion to myself..Just nuggets of gold I could have only learned here and still have people love me!! I remember thanking God for bringing us here and then asking why are we here??? then understanding why we are here ..all in 7 months.I remember watching my shadow die..my most loved dog Hoover..That is a memory I choose to forget!! I remember asking God just recently, What do you have in store for next year? He knows exactly where we will be, working for Him in his Kingdom. He directs our steps each day. I remember God is my all and in Him we find our life and our memories. He creates and manifests the road we walk each day. Be it happy or sad..It "is" and He holds our hands through it all and if by some means we can't walk that road..He carries us in His arms until we are strong enough to walk again. I remember God each day..Do you??

"Joy of the Season"

I am learning to understand that I only know one thing for sure... Jesus and Him crucified...Doctrine, opinions and tradition have no place in the church today...We all know how Jesus felt about traditions of men....WOE was the word He used most!!!

I feel like He must be wondering why we continue in some ways to follow man instead of what the Bible says...Jesus is "the word" and yet, instead of being in the word we listen to someone elses already chewed version and take it for gospel....Now you preachers out there..don't get mad, I am not talking specifically about you..

I am just challenging the body of Christ to READ the word..and ask the Holy Spirit to teach you as well, like it says in 1 John 2:27.The "Joy of this Season" rests, in my eyes, in the fact that I can read His word and learn what is His will for all saints..not just me, all saints..and I have people to help me understand and I can count on the promises of the Lord!!I feel privileged to have the word of God to help me understand that we are here for a reason and that can be "The Joy of the Season"Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all my Facebook friends!!

"The Little Campfire that Could"

Time flies when you are having fun...I feel like I have been on this earth for 10 years in the past month!! Fun??I think not...God is a desert sort of deity..Placing you there for refining, and a fire kind of Father that can warm your insides or burn the beauty out of you.

I for one love the times when it is warm and fuzzy, but there has to be times of refining as well..
My dog had to be put to sleep. That in itself, was unbelievably hard watching him die and taking care of him. I kept waking up and thinking it was a dream. Oh I know it was just an animal, but people who love them, they understand.

God has been changing me inside and out as well..
You know how you think you "know" something, and then God turns your belief upside down? I am learning our Almighty Father is a wisdom giver. All you have to do is really ask..like James says and then WATCH OUT!!! If you open up and really listen, He will teach you things you never thought you could understand.

He may even put you through things you never thought you could make it through..without grabbing hold of something to keep from falling off the edge!! I grabbed His arm so many times this past month, I feel like I pulled it OFF!!

I've got some burn marks on me..They will fade in time, but the pure patience and understanding that I have gained from this last month, will forever be with me.
Our God is a compassionate God and one who loves us. He helps us grow and I am just learning the blessing of a little campfire on my bottom..to get the point across!!

"Change the Pain"

So many people are in "pain" today. Emotional and physical.I look at people's faces and I so want to reach out and tell them, Jesus has gone through everything you are going through..right now!! I want to hug them and tell them everything can be peaceful if you ask God to help and give your life to him to figure out!!

Christians are in pain as well..but what do we say to them?? Faith comes by hearing and hearing the Word of God.. Do you ever just want someone to talk to you about God? We as Christians, need to reach out and comfort our own..Jesus said to love one another..and you will know them by their "love" Sometimes I think we just take for granted that our brothers and sisters are fine and we really just let people fall through the cracks...We are human and need the love of our Christian family.

When was the last time you said.."I should do such and such..." and never did it..I am guilty of this also.."I should take a meal to..." I should go visit..in the hospital" " I should help so and so.." Jesus said..I was hungry and you fed me, I was thirsty and you gave me a drink, I was homeless and you gave me a room, I was shivering and you gave me clothes, I was sick and you stopped to visit me, I was in prison and you came to me..Wow

I am cut to the heart..Out of the mouth of Jesus, comes such simple stuff. God gives us ways to change the pain in this world..very simple steps. Ask God to OPEN YOUR EYES to see what you would not normally see..He will and He will give you ways to serve...Thank you God for giving us a way to "Change the Pain"
Dee Hall

"He Can Handle It!!"

My Jesus is the savior of the world..in case you haven't noticed, but most of all, He is my friend! I have had a really rough last 3 days..My dog is sick, and I have been just fighting with myself!! Do you ever just resign to "give it to God" and than as soon as you do..You "take it back" Man God must be get very confused at me!! "Here ya go..take it"

Nope "Give it back, I want to be miserable some more..Not quite feeling bad enough!!" "Okay here ya go, I am truly ready for you have it now" "No, just one more time God..my eyes aren't puffy enough..I want to see how depressed I can get!! Jesus said " My Yoke is easy and My burden is light..What does that mean??

Yoke up with me..Get in the yoke with Jesus!! He is the big oxen. He will carry most of the load..He is bigger and stronger and knows where to go and how to get there..We are the little cows..unlearned and lost..most of the time!!!He has big broad shoulders..we are barely able to carry ourselves..Most of my life I never understood this concept..He is our big brother and will carry the load..if we really give it to Him!!

Jesus can give you peace and it isn't hard for Him..He wants to..really. I have learned in the last few days..Even if this is the worst..It isn't the worst!! I may feel like God is silent..But it doesn't matter..Even if He is..I do not have to be..Cry to Him.. He can handle it..Pray to him..He hears you!! Weep at Him..He is holding you even if you can't feel it!! God is my friend and my Father. He can handle anything I can't.
Dee Hall

"because I said so"

Do you ever pray? "Gods will be done" And just exactly what do we mean when we ask that? Are we really ready to forge through the flood that God might put us through? Or do we flippantly say this and then complain when God puts us through a testing of our faith..I, for one, am pro at this. Asking for God's will and then crying like a baby when it isn't mine!!

Ya know..God didn't say, contrast to popular beliefs, that being a follower of Christ was going to be hunky dory all the time. In fact ..there are many believers out there confused as to why they aren't livin' the good life. God's will is so much different then our 3rd dimensional pee brains can even fathom. Boy when God said..My ways are not your ways and neither can they be..He was right. I keep forgetting that scripture.

Hmmm again what are we asking when we pray for Gods will? I asked one day, not too long ago,"God use me to further your Kingdom" Things began to happen that only God could put together. I thought, wow God is really going to use us this time in a mighty way. To make a long story short we ended up in the smallest town I have ever seen and here I sit wondering, What did I pray for?? Oh yeah..after much complaining, about the heat, the town, the mission here, the people, the loneliness, oh and let's not forget my,my,my wants...Oh yeah..I prayed for "God's will" Wow..God's will..not mine.

Ask me a few days ago why I was here in the smallest town on Route 66 in Arizona and I would have told you..I don't have the foggiest idea..I am human and Thank God he remembers even when I don't. He remembers when I longingly prayed for His will and I meant it..I really did!! The grace God gives us is like a splash of cool water on our faces that can gently wake us up or a cold bucket, like I needed, to rip us out of a dead sleep and get us going again. It is not about me!!

Isn't it nice when "your will" and "God's will" are the same..and life is grand..Just remember, that is not always the case, and in fact..more times than not, it won't be...Because He is the potter and you are the clay and sometimes I think I hear God saying to me, just like my dad did.."because I said so..that's why" May God bless you and continue to mold and shape us into Jesus
Dee Hall

"Get Back on My Road"

It has taken me a long time to get the fact, everyone is not walking down the path of our Lord at just the same place. For many years I believed it was my job to convince each person to get right next to me on that road. I realized, with much disappointment each time, that no matter how hard I worked, they remained exactly where God wanted them.."GO FIGURE"

As much as I wanted to walk in every way with each of them, God finally taught me..It is okay to be different..to be at different places..with different opinions and even different beliefs!! That is taboo in some churches...And then it dawned on me...God is the judge..He really is!!! Oh I know what some of you are secretly thinking.."She will come around" Come around to my belief..our belief..in our church..

Unity is not conformity...There is a difference..Jesus wants us to have unity "in HIM", but don't you think He knew we would all have our opinions on many different things? He made us...
I have seen so many people hurt from judgementalism and self righteousness..It makes me literally sick to my stomach..Splits in churches over the smallest of things and hate between brother and sisters in Christ!!

I think God is crying over His church...He never imagined His children acting like..well children..
or did He??

Our God is a most wonderful entity!! He knew what would happen in the future!! He is so long suffering...He allows us to be different..in so many places..Romans 14..shows us this.
I ask you now to evaluate yourself as I did, and ask God to give you a Spirit of grace upon people who are not where you are on that road...Ask Him to keep your heart soft.

Ask yourself this question..Do you believe every single thing you did just 3 years ago..If you do I feel sorry for you...Gods Word means different things to different people at different times in their lives..OOOPS did I just step on some people's toes??

I am sorry , but His Word is a living word...working with our conscience and molding us into what GOD wants each individual to be..
He is able to make us stand...through Jesus...and if our heart is open and not closed..He is able to teach us all things through the Spirit..which dwells in us...
Please be a student of Gods Words and find out what he wants from you.
Dee Hall

"Go the Extra Mile.....Even if it Hurts"

I had something put on my plate today that was a test for me. How was I going to handle this difference in opinion? I could get mad and prove my point and yet, Jesus said, "Don't" He says to love everyone and when opposition comes..no matter what it is.."Don't fight!!" "Pray"..So I did. Jesus said if someone slaps your cheek turn and let them slap the other!! What??? No way ..that can't be right. Let someone walk on me??

My personality is the type where I need to prove what I know..Probably from having to prove the Bible to be true in so many Bible studies. It is instilled in me that I must prove "right" is "right" or "wrong" is "wrong". I have always pondered over those verses and have watched many Christians justify their nasty behavior by ignoring them.

They are in red and the words of Jesus himself.."Yes my child...Let someone have the complete upper hand" " Yes my child..let someone take advantage of you" "Yes my child let someone treat you badly" I thought for many years..Those are just guide lines.. No they are not!!! In Matthew 5:45 it says you must do these things.."that you may be sons of your Father in heaven!!"

I am always willing to learn Father..Thank you again for teaching me what love is about and giving me a lesson to learn AGAIN!! Each day if your eyes are opened wide, God will chasten you a little as we do our own children..Don't close your ears from Gods teachings..Give yourself wholly to another and walk with him that extra mile..Jesus lives in us and the world can not know him unless they see Him in us!!
Blessings
Dee Hall